The opposite of 'Stealth'?

I had a long shopping list today. I really wanted to go by myself -- mostly because it makes me feel like “Super Shopper! Queen of Wal-Mart”.
I toss things in the cart decisively; deliberately taking the most efficient route from the health & beauty section to the pet aisle and on to the groceries – as if I’d routed it on MapQuest or something. I move with stealth around old people and moms with litters of children. I am a freaking blur. Self- Checkout? Why yes, thank you. I’m faster than most of the employees.

We have shopped for Evon, Erica & Amanda’s visit for the last three & ½ weeks. Nope, not enough shopping yet…Lib wants to go with me. My shoulders fall, I sigh….I offer to pick up her list from her and just bring it home. She ain’t having it.

I will skip the frustration and details of being a 2-cart family at the store when one of the children with a cart is Lib. I’m sure you can paint your own picture. So much for stealth.

Now is where I would like to reference a note from an earlier blog – Lib being upset about a .98 bag of rice.

Amanda & Erica will want orange juice, she decides. She doesn’t drink orange juice, so she spends $4.98 – YES – FOUR DOLLARS AND NINETY EIGHT CENTS on a liitle six pack of minute made orange juice in little bitty 6 oz. bottles.
$2.79 will get a nice 2 qts of Tropicana.
Do the math.
Whatever floats your boat, Lib.

She bought vanilla ice cream last week. She bought vanilla ice cream again this week. I said , “You just bought ice cream when we were here Wednesday.”
“No... No I didn’t”
So when I put her groceries away I put the new ice cream right next to the other, still unopened, ice cream.

Chicken & Rice anyone?
She wants that for Friday. Uh…she cooked the rice Sunday. She cooked the chicken Monday. It will sit in the refrigerator until Friday. She says she will put it together in the morning and just put it in the oven around lunch time and let it sit in there until they show up.
THIS is why we cook for her and anyone else around whenever possible.

She said while the girls are here they won’t be going out anywhere all together because the baby will be with them. Apparently, you can’t go out to eat or shop if you have a baby.

I said, “Well, if you can’t go anywhere with a baby, exactly how IS the baby getting here in the first place?”

And again…..silence. You can hear the wheels turn.

My zippy run to the store? Two + hours.
Don’t get me wrong, we had some laughs – we always do.
BUT I’m telling you right now SHE IS ON RECORD as telling me “NO MORE STORE THIS WEEK”. You are considered witnesses!!!